Stepping into success often sounds like a really big deal to people. Debra Kasowski, and I spent some time talking about this on a recent episode of my show, The Power House Podcast, and how the little everyday habits actually can help you create success with ease. It doesn’t have to be as hard as people tend to make it.
Often times people tend to shut down when it comes to having a conversation around habits and discipline. Typically, they tune-out or cop-out as fear and other stuff shows up for them when it comes to taking responsibility in this space and holding themselves accountable for how they CHOOSE to show up.
And, the irony is that with a few simple changes and intentional focus around the daily habits and discipline we execute, we can significantly change our lives and the level of success and happiness we bring to us. I loved the discussion Debra and I had around this … and, wanted to share a of the juicier parts with you!
Debra is a three-time international best-selling author, speaker, and certified executive coach, as well as the founder of Debra Kasowski International. She is focused on delivering world-class training and consulting that focuses on helping aspiring business owners and solo-preneurs develop the winning success habits that transform human potential into sustainable profit.
It was truly an honor to talk with her about how individuals get in their own way, make excuses and carry with them limiting beliefs around success. How we think is everything … and, it’s our own conditioning an programming that gets in our way. We believe we can’t, and that’s what we make so.
Debra reminds us that, “You are a leader no matter where you are, and it starts with the leading of self - those habits are really important.” The little daily habits make all the difference in terms of how you choose to move forward, and how you choose to take action inside of that space.
One of the most critical aspects to creating habits that draw in greater success starts with implementing your daily bookends. These routines are essential to create the time you need for yourself to set your morning intentions and wrap up your day with mindful reflection.
Often when I work with clients and discuss this type of ritual they tell me they feel selfish trying to take time for themselves at the beginning and end of the day.
"You are a leader no matter where you are, and it starts with the leading of self - those habits are really important."
This is where I dig into the difference between being selfish and what I like to refer to as being “self-full.” Selfish is a space where you are doing something with no regards to others, in spite of others, or at the mercy of others. Self-full, on the other hand, is a space where you are doing something for yourself in order to serve others.
For, you truly cannot give that which you do not take time to replenish. Your cup must be full or overflowing to serve at your highest and best capacity.
And, this means putting YOU first!
It’s actually selfish not to take care of yourself first!
For what you fill up, you have the capacity to give out and share. It you are giving, and not receiving … you are only depleting yourself. And, then that becomes the icky stuff you are “gifting” to others as a token of your love and service.
Thank about that … how selfish and arrogant is it to think you are super human, to think you don’t need to care for yourself in order to serve others at your highest and best level, to believe you are so special that you are not worthy of self-care?
By sacrificing the two most critical aspects of your day (how you start and end your day), you also sacrifice your ability to lead. Creating space to fuel and move your body, ground and center yourself, meditate, journal, and plan your biggest priorities allows you to show up powerfully … and, with authority, grace, compassion and greater purpose and fire.
When you create that space to set intention around how you choose to lead, and how you choose to show up, it becomes a serious game-changer that opens up access to so much more. You become a cutting-edge leader, a role model and someone who has an abundant amount of energy to do more, give more and be more!
Simply by introducing daily bookends, literally 10 to 30 minutes of your day, at the beginning and the end, can significantly change your life. Believe it or not, I actually have a minimum of 90 minutes it the morning, and then again in the evening. I have never been more focused, more centered, more energized … or, have I ever had more white space and playtime!
Imagine a meeting room full of 20 individuals who have all spent the time in their morning to get really clear on their priorities and goals for the day. A group of individuals highly energized and bringing their best A game. Imagine how productive, engaged and valuable the work that went on in that meeting would be.
Debra believes “Businesses would transform by just giving time for people to be self-full….to really have that at the beginning of their day and the end of their day and really transform cultures to being leading edge leadership.”
I couldn’t agree more!
As we began to talk about how to shift to a millionaire mindset, Debra reminded us that, “your environment is giving you feedback.” Everything we like and don’t like about a situation is being mirrored back at us.
She suggests asking yourself these three questions when you don’t like something in your environment:
Measuring our progress in any given arena of our lives is the only way to know what is working and not working in regards to our habits. There is a great saying “What you measure grows, and what you don’t stands still and dies.”
People don’t realize that:
I believe asking the three questions Debra posed is an extremely powerful to connect into how you are truly showing up and whether or not you are effectively serving … not only from an awareness standpoint, but also from a personal responsibility and accountability standpoint.
When we are out of alignment, creative tension, or conflict can arise and cause us to lose trust in ourselves which can often cost us - and cost us in BIG ways. Debra discussed the power of allowing our intuition to guide us as opposed to working against ourselves, and bringing more stress, overwhelm and anxiety into our lives.
These types of signs arise all the time. When you start flexing that muscle more you can begin to recognize them quickly, and take action when they show up instead of creating even more extra resistance. Those daily little habits Debra mentioned become increasingly important as they help us better choose how to respond when this kind of stress and resistance shows up.
Another opportunity is to slow down … to create the power of the pause. Most people tend to have a hard time being still and getting quiet enough to listen to their intuition. However, when they do create space for the pause, they then have the ability to acknowledge that they already have what they need to make the right decision.
Once again, that means taking responsibility for how you choose to show up and how you choose to lead. Remember, leadership is ultimately a choice!
“Show up as who you want to be and soon enough you will be”
Debra talks about responsibility as being the ability to respond to a situation versus being reactive in that situation. A good example I hear often as it relates to individuals not taking responsibility is when someone says “I don’t want to make a decision.”
What they don’t realize is … that when they choose not to decide, when they don’t make a decision, that they are actually making the most powerful decision of all. For in that moment, you are choosing to NOT take personal responsibility, and you also are handing your power over to someone else to decide for you.
Leaders make decisions! Leaders take action!
In order to begin to step into success and really tap into your millionaire mindset you must be ready to take responsibility for the way you are showing up each day. This includes creating meaningful habits and discipline in your day, and giving yourself clear metrics to measure your progress.
“Show up as who you want to be and soon enough you will be” -Debra Kasowski
If you are ready to elevate your game and create a millionaire mindset as a leader … check out this incredible episode of The Power House Podcast with my guest, Debra Kasowski, to learn more: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-power-house/id1239233530
In love, light and blessings … I am sending you huge heart-to-heart hugs!
Lead from love, with love, my friend!
With deep gratitude, Candy
PS: Be sure to subscribe to The Power House Podcast so you don’t miss any of our upcoming conversations with incredible thought leaders disrupting the space of leadership: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-power-house/id1239233530
Candy Barone is a leadership development expert, trainer & executive coach. She also is an international speaker, author, and the CEO & Founder of You Empowered Strong, LLC.